Zero plus

An accident took place — never something to joke about - outside Eight Day Tire on Dave Ward Drive that Sunday, Dec. 3 minutes after 3 p.m. There was, dispatch told the reporting officer, an injury, and he responded to the site.

On arrival the reporting officer saw the fire department had beat him there, first responders on site, "treating the driver," 29, named in the report. Shortly after an ambulance arrived, its attendants treating the man. He refused, the officer reported, to go to the hospital.

With all this the officer got what information he needed from the man, then, as the man was preparing to leave, asked to do a Field Sobriety Test ("FST" it’s called in the trade) just to make sure the man was okay to drive. The man agreed to do so.

The test began with the eyes-follow-finger thing. That didn’t go so well with some flickering and otherwise lack of smoothness. Walking followed, then standing on one leg, the usual, and that, too, did not go all that well. The man, apparently, had some lack of motor function as would be appropriate for a motor vehicle operator, unsteady and swaying as he was.

So they took him downtown for the breath test. There the plot thickened, where the man blew a 0.0 BAC after the mandatory 20 minute observation period. A Drug Recognition Expert (DRE) was called. As the testing by that officer was underway, the man admitted to the reporting officer that he had taken "four hits of a joint" (four inhalations from a marijuana cigarette) 30 minutes before the accident.

He was booked into jail, charged with DUI, first offence.

Food to the door

Not long before 10 a.m., 9:50 to be exact, when police were called to Dusty’s, a convenience store, on Harkrider. A woman had been spotted shoplifting from the store, police were told, taking a bag of chips and a cold drink, and leaving through a side door without paying for for the goods.

Several police responding. One reported spotting the woman nearby and got out to speak with her. A second officer stopped there to assist. The reporting officer, however, went to Dusty’s to speak with the employee there who had called in the theft.

There the employee told the officer the woman had stolen a bag of Sweet Southern Heat BBQ potato chips and an orange soda. The officer radioed a description of the items to the other officers with the woman and were told, down to the brand name, this is what the woman had with her. With that the woman, 57, was arrested.

She was handcuffed and put in a patrol car, the pilfered goods returned to the store as the woman was being taken to jail. She was charged with theft, and given a criminal trespass warning for the store.

(Potato chips first came about from a Saratoga Springs, NY restaurant in the mid 1800s. The restaurant, part of the Moon Lake Lodge resort, was well regarded for its french fries. One diner, however, complained that the fries were too thick and the chef, in order to accommodate, made a batch of thin fries. These were still too thick for the diner and a third batch, thinner still, was produced. These, too thin to eat with a fork, satisfied the customer, who was the first person to have potato chips with a meal. Mass production by the late 1800s made potato chips more well-known, and the invention of a wax packaging in 1926, which allowed shipment and storage, led to potato chips being both more widely distributed and ultimately more popular. Prior to the invention of the packaging, a man named Herman Lay sold potato chips from the trunk of his car.)

Diogenes’ Cadillac

An officer was on patrol when he spotted a Cadillac turn into the parking lot of the 10 Box store without using its turn signal. It was Monday, Dec. 4, just after 8 a.m. At the sight of this infraction the officer went blue lights and stopped the car.

The officer, of course, stepped up to the driver’s window and introduced himself. In doing so he recognized the driver, and recalled the driver did not have a valid driver’s license. The officer asked and the man admitted that no, he should not be driving. His driver’s license was suspended, the man admitted.

The officer arrested the 38 year old man, of course, but did allow him to call his mother-in-law in order to come and get daughter, who was in the car with him. A second officer arrived to assist.

A tow truck was called to impound the car. The man’s mother-in-law arrived and the young girl, as well as what cash and personal effects the man had with him were turned over to her. He was taken to jail. The man was due in court that day for a previous suspended license arrest, the same officer, it turned out, being the one who arrested him. With this in mind, and after a consultation with the city attorney, the man was held pending first appearance.